The Return of the Mistletoe
by LeaderPinhead
Summary: Skywarp has learned a lot about the human holidays. It's too bad his luck outweighs his supposed knowledge. Companion holiday special to A New Version of Reality.


**AN: **Merry Christmas (or whatever holiday you may celebrate this time of year)! I really wanted to get something up for Christmas, and the majority of you guys who took the time to vote in my poll wanted a special for A New Version of Reality. I honestly attempted to do something cutesy with the sparklings, but we all know the terrible luck that Skywarp has suffered with a certain piece of seasonal floral :3 So I hope you guys enjoy!

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><p>A New Version of Reality: Holiday Special<p>

The Return of the Mistletoe

Notes: Takes place during Chapter 28: NIMROD Moments

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><p>It was that time in the human's yearly cycle again. The time when the little humans donned their hideous outer wear and pretended to like each other a little more than usual. The time when cone-shaped floral was chopped down and decorated with little plastic orbs and blinking lights. Cards were sent out with "season's greetings," and mountains of colorful paper were wasted to hide boxes that would be ripped open without a second thought.<p>

However, it was also the season ripe for blooming love. For two potentially opposite personalities to attract and discover that they weren't as different as they thought. Or for someone to hire another person to pretend they're married so as not to disappoint the Person A's parents during the holidays, but they ultimately fell in love anyways, so it didn't really matter if Person B was hired to pretend to be in love in Person A, and they flash-forward to the next holiday season when they're happily married and already have a bundle of joy to show off at the next family gathering.

At least, that's what Skywarp had discovered from the sappy movies that had played non-stop the entire month. Not that they were a _bad_ thing, per say. For all their terrible sappiness, they had certainly armed him with a trove of invaluable information that made his already ingenious plans completely full proof.

He would have to purge his processor of all the badly scripted movies later, but it would all be worth it.

"Skywarp!"

Skywarp glanced down to see a pair of bright red optics glaring up at him. He smirked. "What's up, Star-brat?"

Star growled, and Skywarp snickered. His sparkling-fied trine mate's angry noises were just too adorable to be found intimidating. "Don't call me that!"

"Aw!" Skywarp reached down to poke the tiny vents that framed Star's face. "Aren't you just _adorable_ when you're angry?"

Star chomped down on one of Skywarp's hands, but the older Seeker didn't even flinch. He had never gotten around to enabling the sensors in the holo-thingamabob the Auto-nerd had given him. "You are just so _cute_."

The Seekerlet snarled once more before spitting out the mass of photons. "And you're so _stupid_. What're you doing, stupid?"

Skywarp's smiled shifted to a small scowl. "Don't be rude. What would Vicky say?"

Any retort that Star may have had prepared was visibly halted as the mechling opened and then quickly closed his mouth. His signature pout flashed across his face, and he stubbornly crossed his arms across his chest. Skywarp snickered at the posture. "Vivi would agree with me. 'Cause I'm cute, and you're stupid."

"Yeah, yeah. Go play with your chemistry set for a while."

Star immediately relaxed and stepped closer to his disguised brother. Skywarp shifted to the side when the Seekerlet leaned against his arm. "What are you doing to Vivi's door? You're supposed to give plants to _her_—not hang them from the ceiling! Don't you know anything?"

Skywarp took the moment to glare down at Star with his red brown eyes before ripping off another strip of tape to attach to the small bundle of leaves and red berries. "I know that, you little brat. It's a grown up thing that you wouldn't understand."

"Wheeljack says half my spark is adult. Which means even with half an adult spark, I can understand adult things better than you do. And what you're doing is stupid—not adult."

Skywarp finally grunted and dropped his arms. Star squawked as the holoform shoved him away from the door and towards the center of the base. "Go bug somebody else for, like, ten minutes, and I'll take you out for a flight later."

Star dug his heel into the floor. "I wanna go to the valley again."

"But Star—"

"I'm gonna scream and make Vivi yell at you."

Skywarp growled at the wide smirk that spread across Star's face. "_Fine_. We'll go to your stupid valley to look at the stupid rocks again. But only if you go annoy somebody else until I'm finished."

"'Kay!"

The Seeker sighed as miniature Starscream skipped down the hallway. He twisted back around to the door and rubbed his hands together when he was sure everything was in place. He straightened his temporary spine and knocked on the closed door with a controlled rhythm. He waited for a moment before quickly rapping against it again.

There was a squeal from behind the door—probably Recall since Skywarp was pretty sure the kid didn't like to leave his sister for very long after her frame transfer. Whoever created the squeal was irrelevant though, and Skywarp stepped closer when he heard the quiet thud of footsteps that followed.

The moment had finally arrived; this time there was nothing to stand in his way as he activated the full effects of the fabled mistletoe. There was no Autobot to suddenly sweep in and play the "good guy;" no annoying cat to snatch his mistletoe away; no Star to butt in and be "adorable."

It was a fool proof plan that made even him want to puff up with pride.

"Skywarp, what are you doing?"

Skywarp spun around just as the door swung open. Rumble snickered from beside the young woman as she stared at Skywarp with a one hand propped on her hip and a stoic eyed femmeling on the other. Recall giggled up at Skywarp while clinging to Victoria's pant leg. "I…but…what are you doing here?"

Victoria's eyebrows rose. "I _was_ about to go into Zabrowski's office and ask him why I have an invoice for another forty pounds of tinsel and jingle bells, but it looks like you may have beat me here."

"Mistletoe!"

Skywarp twisted back around and stared in slight horror at the older man standing beneath the sprig of mistletoe with him. Toshi giggled along with Recall while Zabrowski threw his arms around Skywarp's frozen form. "I always loved mistletoe! Though, admittedly, _I'm_ usually the one hanging it up to catch others underneath. But it nice to have other way around."

Skywarp didn't move an inch as Zabrowski released him from the hug and only flinched when his face was squished between a pair of rough hands. He croaked when Zabrowski forced him down to his height and enthusiastically kissed both of his cheeks.

He stayed in that position afterwards, Zabrowski sidling past him with a little hop to grab the mistletoe that hung from the door frame. "I didn't even know we have mistletoe. This changes everything! Come, my little robot babies. We must bring mistletoe joy to all!"

Skywarp nearly tripped on his feet spinning around again, and he couldn't even will himself to emit a croak this time as he watched Zabrowski jiggle the plant above Victoria's head before landing a smacking kiss on her cheek. The woman sighed as he did the same to a disgruntled Topaz and shook her head with a small smile as Toshi and Recall hopped around her feet in an attempt to the do the same while their role model moved on to Rumble. "Careful, Zabrowski. Mistletoe can be a pretty powerful weapon when used correctly."

"Ah, you're right…is Agent Willy still in conference room?"

Zabrowski skipped down the hallway with two cheery mechlings on his heels. Skywarp twitched at the sight of his mistletoe swinging from the man's hand. Victoria lightly laughed at the sound of Rumble's complaints of assault. "Come on. I doubt we're going to get our answer about the mystery tinsel and bells, but if we move fast enough we might be able to question Wheeljack about this twenty barrels of petroleum jelly before Zabrowski gets a hold of him. See you later Skywarp."

A groan escaped the Seeker as the woman walked away without a second glance. Rumble snickered at Skywarp and slapped a hand across his shoulder as he passed. "Next time ya might not wanna dump a pail of paint on Frenzy. He's really good at switching room numbers around…and your brother's not that bad either."


End file.
